i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Randomize
