Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
As shirtless as possible
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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