Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
