i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
