$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Randomize
