Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
whose ass print is on the piano?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
