walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
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