ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
