the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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