last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
