What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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