there's paper in my vomit.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
