She announced her abortion via fbk
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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