Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
