She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
it's like heaven, but drunker
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
