is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
My liver just had a heart attack.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
