Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize