Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
