Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Randomize
