wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Alive.
So much puke
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
