Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
