What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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