you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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