I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
