youre lurking in front of me
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
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