Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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