first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize