He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
