his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Randomize
