i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
