Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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