Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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