Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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