you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
