omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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