i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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