I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
