it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
