I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Randomize
