They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
