I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
