I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
