saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
