whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
zippers are such a cool invention
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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