i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Randomize
