Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
