Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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