i think my mom watched the whole time
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
