I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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