The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
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