so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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