Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I wish I only lived at night.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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