omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
